How could it be?

how could it be? when i was in a third world country i was so happy i was making a difference. but now that i am home i feel like the world doesn't need me that i am not making a difference. i mean im not suicidal at all i love life i couldn't imagine ending it but still i feel un-needed here. when i was in asia life seemed like it needed me so much. i was going from small hut to small hut talking to people with amazing stories of war and strif but back home when i talk to someone here there intresting storys are about something crazy they did when they were bored. and really when you listen its stupid things that. maybe its just because i love asia. that has to be it really. so now i just have to keep on hoping and praying my way back there so some day i can go and continue doing what i love to do and what i think god put me on this earth to do.
yes i believe in go and i would love to be a missionary for him. spreading him around the world is the best job that i can think of. right now i am call to run an orphnage to help take care of all the little kids that need parents. my heart is in Cambodia well more Phnom Penh and the surrounding villages. i have been there twice and couldn't imagiane more amazing people in all the world. they care so much and will accept you for who you are. i guess its late. more tomorrow

love and peave